Tuesday, October 22, 2013

Meow

So, we've had a little drama around here this morning. It went a little something like this...

<< Email arrives inbox>>

 Email: Hey! Here is a picture of a really cute kitten that needs a home. We found it and if it doesn't get a home, the humane society will stick it in a bag and drown it. (ok, I "may" be paraphrasing here)

Me <<sends email to Eric.>>: Hey, know anyone who wants a cat?
 
(the below is copy/pasted directly from email)
 

E: Us?

Me: I wasn’t thinking about us, but do you want a kitty? It IS pretty cute, but I know NOTHING about caring for cats. Can I keep it in a box until you get home?


(second email) How young is too young to declaw a kitten? And, if I use the brush attachment, can I vacuum the dander and hair directly off of it?
 
E: You're funny.  

E: Can we be the last hope for kitty?

Me: You mean, we’ll take him/her if no one else does?
 
E: Maybe??
 
Me: OK. I emailed J (Thinking, no way there is a chance that this cat is coming to our house, so this is safe, right?) 
Me, to J: Let me know if no one else takes this tiny troublemaker. I’ve never had a pet, but cats are supposed to be more independent than dogs, and my husband really wants a pet. If no one else takes him, I will learn to be a pet mommy. But, this really has to be last resort - like, if its a choice between the needle and home, we'll take him, but if ANYONE else wants him, they get him.

<<Approximately .6 seconds later>>
 
J, to our entire 100 person department:  The kitty has found a home!  As long as he’s still available, you can congratulate Megan on the new addition to her family. J

Me, to J: J! Seriously! Last resort!


Panic ensues. And by ensues, I mean, I am panicking, thinking that I am going to have to pick up this cat tonight, and take it home. I am planning on having rice and beans for dinner. Do kittens eat rice and beans? What is it going to do while I sleep? Will it be ok? What if it needs something and I'm sleeping? Is it going to pee on the carpet? I'm going to get this thing home, and I'm going to look at it, and it's going to look at me, and I'm going ask it what it wants, and its just going to stare at me because CATS DON'T TALK! Crap, what have I done? Why did I even let this become a possibility. This was stupid, this may be the stupidest thing I have ever done. Oh, my, GOD I DON'T KNOW HOW TO TAKE CARE OF AN ANIMAL! AND ERIC IS IN CHICAGO AND THIS THING IS GOING TO BE IN MY HOUSE!

By this point, I am pretty much in tears, having a full on anxiety moment about this cat, and what in the holy !#%#@ I have done here.

Long story short, we aren't  getting a cat. We found a family for it who is MUCH better prepared for this kind of thing than I am, obviously.

Remind me not to do this again.

1 comment:

  1. Yay, you have a blog! I have a feeling I'm going to like reading about the adventures in your head :) In part because at least this one sounds like what would have gone on in mine!

    ReplyDelete